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"On the Bookshelf"
First, a book! Congratulations to Leigh Ann for winning a copy of Tracey Bianchi’s book, Mom Connection: Creating Vibrant Relationships in the Midst of Motherhood, published by MOPS. “In this witty, encouraging book, Tracey Bianchi shows us how to cultivate deeper friendships that challenge us to grow, create healthy, life-giving rhythms for our families, and connect and give back to the wider world beyond our doors.” Yay, Leigh Ann! Hope you enjoy the book!
And secondly, a blessing! A few years back, I came across this excerpt by Mary Jean Irion. It’s “a mother’s reflection as she combed her seven-year-old daughter’s hair after a bath,” and I completely love it. Hope it blesses you!
Comb and dry, comb and dry. “Soon I won’t be able to do this any more,” you say to yourself, knowing that the little straight bob must inevitably yield to grown-up coiffures and ugly curlers. What will she be like at fourteen? Where will her hair be blowing then? And sixteen and eighteen—you suppose boys will love to watch her hair blow as you do now. And some of them will feel it on their faces, and one of them will marry her, and her hair will be perfect under the veil, and there will be her hair spread out on his pillow…oh, you hate him a little and wonder where he is at this moment and whether he’ll be good to her….They will grow old together…the gold-brown hair will be gray, and you will be gone, and then she will be gone…this very hair that now your fingers smooth…All the tears of the world swim for a second in your eyes as you snatch the plug out of the socket suddenly and gather her into your arms, burying your face in the warm hairs as if you could seal this moment against all time.
“…she may well perish with the shame of having such a mother.”
–Elizabeth Bennet, Pride and Prejudice
Oh, moms. We try, don’t we? I’ve never met a mother who didn’t try—who didn’t want the best for her kids.
But.
Try as we may, we aren’t perfect. Every year on this blog, in honor of Mother’s Day, we share our shortcomings. Mother’s Day Confessions are a lighthearted look at our motherhood mess-ups. No pretense or pretending here! Confess with me, and then, let’s celebrate our day by resting in God’s grace. He is always enough, even when we aren’t! (2 Corinthians 12:9)
Mother’s Day Confessions — 2012
- One evening, I stood in the hall between my kids’ bedrooms and complimented Nathan on his clean room. “It’s so clean, I could do cartwheels in there!” Then, with a look at the girls’ room, I added, “…But this room is much less conducive to cartwheels.” The girls burst into tears, I apologized profusely, and everyone went to bed feeling terrible.
- I didn’t pay attention to a change in Molly’s ballet schedule, and I dropped her off at the studio an hour late. She called in tears. “I don’t know what happened but this isn’t my class and these aren’t my friends so can you please come GET ME?!”
- I don’t tuck my kids in bed anymore. In fact, most often, they come tell me good night…because I’m already in bed.
- My most frequent answer to Nathan’s homeschooling questions this year was, “No idea. Google it.”
- One night, I missed a three-inch step off my friend’s front porch. I flung my arms out, trying to regain my balance in the slow-motion fall. In the process, I punched Molly in the nose and glasses. Then I grabbed her by the shirt collar, and nearly pulled her down with me. I more than doubly outweigh her, and yet, I apparently expected her to catch me.
- Driving home, I saw an old wooden rocking chair on the side of the road. After trying for ten minutes to get it into our little car, I made Nathan carry it all the way to our house. Through our entire neighborhood. While his friends rode circles around him on their bikes, and he blushed with embarrassment.
- Speaking of that rocking chair, you may remember this story about a confrontation with our HOA. Now, here’s the rest of the story. After a tender moment in prayer for our enemies, as Nathan headed back outside to play, I offered this Christlike advice: “…and if she ever talks to you like that again, just say, ‘Lady, who peed in your Cheerios?’”
- “You’re probably the only mom who makes every devotion be about sex, Mom.” (Hey, YOU read James 1:15 and tell me that isn’t a sex ed class waiting to happen.)
- “Mom, can we PLEASE wash my sheets? These STILL have blood on them from when I got that bloody nose, like, a LONG time ago.”
- Anne: “How do fish have babies?” Me: “The mom fish lays eggs, and the dad fish squirts man juice on ‘em.”
Okay, your turn! Leave your confessions in the comments, and you’ll be entered to win a copy of Mom Connection: Creating Vibrant Relationship in the Midst of Motherhood, by Tracey Bianchi, new from MOPS! I’ll do a random drawing at noon on Tuesday, May 15, when I’ll post more about the book. Good luck, and Happy Mother’s Day!
Some time later, Jesus went up to Jerusalem for a feast of the Jews. Now there is in Jerusalem near the Sheep Gate a pool, which in Aramaic is called Bethesda and which is surrounded by five covered colonnades. Here a great number of disabled people used to lie—the blind, the lame, the paralyzed. One who was there had been an invalid for thirty-eight years. When Jesus saw him lying there and learned that he had been in this condition for a long time, he asked him, “Do you want to get well?”
“Sir,” the invalid replied, “I have no one to help me into the pool when the water is stirred. While I am trying to get in, someone else goes down ahead of me.” Then Jesus said to him, “Get up! Pick up your mat and walk.” At once the man was cured; he picked up his mat and walked. (John 5:1-9)
Growing up, my least favorite two letters together were, without a doubt, P and E.
As in, P.E., as in Physical Education class. As in, “Time to awkwardly wear shorts under your skirts, girls, because we’re going to force you to kick a ball and climb a rope, and then we’ll tell you that it’s good for you!”
I hated P.E.
More than once (or more than 50 times), I lied to avoid P.E. I twisted my ankle, I felt the flu coming on, I forgot to wear shorts under my skirt and couldn’t possibly risk showing the boys my underpants…anything to get out of physical education. I knew the P.E. teachers were on to my tricks, but I didn’t care. I just didn’t want to exercise.
Similarly (sort of), I once heard a marriage counselor say that he can tell within just a few minutes of meeting a couple whether or not their marriage will improve—or even make it at all.
“It’s obvious from the very beginning,” he said, “if they intend to try or not.”
He’s like a P.E. teacher, leading husbands and wives to something that’s “good” for them. But all the tips, books, and Bible teaching in the world won’t help some marriages, because they just don’t want to try.
In John 5, Jesus met a man who hadn’t been able to walk for 38 years. Jesus asked one of his right-to-the-point questions.
“Do you want to get well?”
Do you want to stand on your own two feet, or are you honestly happier here by the pool? After all, this water is all you’ve known for 38 years….
Do you want to have a better marriage? Or are you honestly happier being right, and stubborn, and resentful? After all, a better marriage requires service, submission, and forgiveness….
Do you want to exercise in P.E. class? Or are you honestly happier lying about injury and illness? After all, exercise means kicking a ball, climbing a rope, and wearing shorts under your skirt….
Jesus knew that sometimes, we don’t want to get well. We are happier in our pain, addiction, or anger. After all, healing means stopping our lies, and changing our lives.
Healing is a Choice: Ten Decisions That Will Transform Your Life and Ten Lies That Can Prevent You From Making Them is for anyone who wants to get well. Stephen Arterburn first released Healing is a Choice in 2005, but it was recently revised, updated, and re-released by Thomas Nelson. Today’s version includes a full workbook, with application questions to facilitate healthy change. Throughout, Arterburn balances compassion with truth. He offers ten decisions for people who want to get well: the choice to feel your life, the choice to heal your future, the choice to forgive, the choice to persevere, and more—and his insights are all grounded in scripture.
From the book:
- “The power to heal—physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually—is in God’s hands. But the choice to be healed is yours.”
- “I don’t know how long you have struggled, but I know this: it is time to pick up your mat and walk, or pick up your mat and cry, or pick up your mat and drive to a meeting, or pick up your mat and take your medicine, or pick up your mat and help someone else, or pick up your mat and utter a simple prayer of surrender to taking the path toward healing. It is time to pick up your life and experience all that God has for you.”
- “This very second is the beginning of the future you choose. You can choose a future that is burdened by an unresolved past that clouds every day with sickness and confusion….Or you can choose to live to please God and not yourself. You can choose to live in His promises for healing rather than your history of brokenness. Your future is your choice.”
“Do you want to get well?” the Lord asked the man. Perhaps he asks us, too. Healing isn’t easy, but it is a choice. Ready to stop the lies and start the transformation? Ready for the healing that only God can give? Then don’t miss Stephen Arterburn’s Healing is a Choice.
Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from Thomas Nelson Publishers' BookSneeze program.
Update! Congratulations to four commenters! According to Random Integer, copies of Always There will go to:
- Gina Williams (4/9 at 8:38 PM)
- Lisa Stewart (4/10 at 4:47 AM)
- Lori Dees (4/10 at 1:44 PM)
- Heather Ratliff (4/11 at 5:02 PM)
Hooray for you, ladies! Please email me your street address (amy@amystorms.com) and I’ll get your book to you! Happy reading!
See this book? Always There is a compilation of 52 short devotions for moms, published by Revell and MOPS International. I’m so excited to offer FOUR COPIES of it this week, to four of you fabulous readers! Always There reminds us that God is always with us, in our marriages and friendships, in our jobs, and even in the times when we feel overwhelmed. Always There includes fantastic writers like Ann Voskamp, Hayley DiMarco, Tracey Bianchi, my hilarious Joplin friend and hero Cindy Dagnan, and more.
And, can I tell you a fun little secret? Yours truly is one of those and more! It’s true! See? It says my name, right there on page 175.
I’ve looked at it about 300 times, just to be sure.
So, would you help me get the word out about Always There? Let all your mom-friends know, and order it here. Also, leave a comment for a chance to win one of these four copies. I’ll do a random drawing on Friday at noon PST. In your comment, why don’t you tell me the names and ages of your kids or grandkids? That way, I can pray for you and your “babies” to know that He is always there!
Our friends over at Ungrind webzine are giving away two copies of What Women Fear by Angie Smith. Don’t miss your chance to win this fantastic book!
Drumroll, please…
***UPDATE: Congratulations to two winners, Diana and Sarah! You each won a copy of MomSense by Jean Blackmer. Please email me your addresses and I’ll get your books in the mail! Thanks for commenting, and happy reading!
I’m so happy to offer MomSense: A Common-Sense Guide to Confident Mothering, to two readers!
And, since this blog boasts around six readers, well, your chances of winning are very, very good.
Giveaway details are below, but first, more about the book. MomSense offers practical advice and personal stories to moms of little ones. Author Jean Blackmer helps moms determine their own unique parenting styles and strengths. Her questions and quizzes throughout make MomSense an ideal choice for a moms’ group. Most of all, MomSense lets moms know that they do, indeed, have what it takes to mother the kids God gave them…much-needed encouragement because, moms, don’t we all secretly wonder if we can actually do this mother thing right?
Or maybe I’m the only one.
Mothers of Preschoolers (MOPS) has generously provided two signed(!) copies of MomSense, so let’s do something fun. Leave a comment before Friday, November 25, and I’ll choose two winners. In the comments, tell me…the best OR worst part of mothering. For example, the best part of mothering is bedtime prayers. The worst part is…the puke. You get the idea.
Be sure to comment on this post (not on facebook, dear friends) before Friday! On your mark, get set, go!
I just read and enjoyed Greg Paul’s lyrical book, Close Enough to Hear God Breathe, as a part of Thomas Nelson’s BookSneeze program. Pastor of Sanctuary, a ministry in downtown Toronto, Mr. Paul tells the Great Story of scripture. That story, says Paul, is one of intimacy between God and His Beloved. With stories from his own experience in marriage, fatherhood, ministry and more, Paul explores God’s relationship with man from Creation, the Fall, Redemption, and Consummation.
A few highlights:
As the writer of the letter to the Hebrews put it, “In the past God spoke to our forefathers through the prophets at many times and in various ways, but in these last [most recent] days he has spoken to us by His Son”—or, as a literal translation would render it, “he has spoken to us in Son.” That is, in the language of “Son,” the language of intimate, familial relationship.
Two things are necessary for me to be able to hear someone breathing: I must be quiet and I must be close.
I want to “hear” the story God is telling me—the Great Story of his passionate love for all humanity and all creation. Wisdom is being able also to find my own personal little story within that big one. I want my spirit to vibrate at the same frequency as the Spirit.
[God's ultimate redemptive agenda] begins to take place in me when I finally hear what he has been speaking to me over and over again—that I am not truly a slave, a reject, or even one who sincerely but unsuccessfully tries to do the right thing, but his child, the heir to all his goodness and glory.
…the Great Storyteller is recounting his story to me, and whispering to me, personally, individually, those beautifully intimate words: my child, my love, my pleasure.
Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from Thomas Nelson Publishers as part of their BookSneeze Blogger program.
I finished two fantastic books a few weeks ago, and I can’t stop thinking about them. Andy graciously surprised me with a hotel room all to myself that weekend, and I took these books with me. I read and read and read, ordered room service, and read and read and read some more. Both books had messages so timely for me—so very obviously written for Amy Storms—that I want to call their authors and scold them for reading my Moleskine.
Pause to shudder at the thought of anyone ever reading my journals.
The first book, What Women Fear: Walking in Faith that Transforms was just released by Angie Smith. Her first book, I Will Carry You, is also a treasure, as is her blog. But if you know me at all, you understand why What Women Fear spoke my language. Fear is my thing. Angie discusses ten different fears, including the fear of rejection, the fear of death, and the fear of not being significant. I read What Women Fear through tears and laughter, and as I said, I read during my hotel stay. When the room service man arrived with my dinner, I opened the door with this book in one hand, and my cell phone in the other. I held my phone because I was afraid of him! I figured my phone would show Big Scary Room Service Man that I was ready to call 911, so he’d better not try anything.
With my other hand, I clutched my book against my chest. He carried in my tray, set it down, and nodded toward the book. “So, what do women fear?”
I laughed. “Um, pretty much everything!” Did he know I was afraid of him?
Anyway, Angie Smith discusses fear and faith so honestly and biblically that I—Amy Storms, lifelong chicken—closed its pages praying, “Okay, Lord, let’s do this thing.”
The second book, One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp, released last year. I’m the last woman in Christendom to read it, I know. Many of you have emailed me about how good it is, and how I simply have to read it. My friend gave me this book several months ago, and I started it right away, but when I was already in tears by page two, I decided to put it away until just the right time.
My hotel weekend was just the right time.
(Except, I did get a few looks for crying over my omelet at the hotel breakfast bar while I read. Perhaps I shouldn’t read over meals anymore.)
One Thousand Gifts is a story of gratitude—Voskamp’s beautifully written journey to contentment, joy, humility, community, and more…all because she determined to be thankful. A simple list of one thousand gifts transformed her life. I’ve written previously about my own struggle with contentment—how long it took (is taking?) me to “learn contentment”, as Paul said in Philippians. Gratitude is key! Thankfulness, as Ann Voskamp discovers, changes everything.
And so, dear readers, please read these books. Go buy them. Right now, this very moment. You will be, as I am, so thankful for the humility, honesty, and giftedness of their authors. You’ll also thank God for life-changing lessons in faith and gratitude.
Recently, I read The Blessing: Giving the Gift of Unconditional Love and Acceptance, by John Trent and Gary Smalley. My mom and mother-in-law recommended this book to me years ago, so when I saw that Thomas Nelson released an updated version, I jumped at the chance to review it for their BookSneeze program.
The Blessing is based on the Old Testament concept of parents “blessing” children–specifically, Jacob and Esau in Genesis 27. Esau missed his father’s blessing, thanks to his conniving brother. Trent and Smalley discuss the heartache and hurt of missing a parent’s blessing…and the life-changing, life-giving effects of receiving it. They offer five elements of every blessing:
- meaningful touch
- a spoken message
- attaching high value
- picturing a special future
- an active commitment
What a blessing The Blessing is! I learned so much about my kids, and how I need to bless them better. But this book isn’t only for parents. I also learned the power of blessing Andy, and I was particularly challenged by the concept of “meaningful touch”, since I’m not a toucher-feeler by nature. A few great quotes from The Blessing:
“Gaining or missing out on parental approval has a tremendous effect on us, even if it has been years since we have had any contact with them. In fact, what happens in our relationship with our parents can greatly affect all our present and future relationships.”
“Many addictions…have their roots in the deep loneliness of growing up without a parent’s blessing.”
“For a child in search of the blessing, silence communicates mostly confusion. Children who are left to fill in the blanks when it comes to what their parents think about them will often fail the test when it comes to feeling valuable and secure.”
“Each of us should be keenly aware of the power of our words. We should also be aware of how powerful the absence of such words can be.”
For your kids, for your spouse, for your friends, and for the sake of your own healing…don’t miss The Blessing!
Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from Thomas Nelson Publishers as part of their BookSneeze program. But they didn’t make me say I like it…I just do. 
I found this jotted down in an old note, and it made me laugh:
“Uh, Mom. Why do you have a book called Child Training Tips? I don’t think we need trained.” -Molly Jane, age 5
I laughed because I remembered how offended she was! And because, she hasn’t changed a bit.
For the record, Child Training Tips by Reb Bradley was one of my favorite parenting books when my kids were little, just in case you’re interested. Because, like it or not, we all need trained.
